Quiet on the home front…

Things have been quiet around here for the past week because of some big life changes and wanting to spend as much family time as possible. We found out Eric would be deploying and we had a lot to accomplish before he could leave. We only had a week to prepare and to be completely honest this was shocking and I was crushed. At this point I still don’t think it has really hit me because I didn’t have time to really process it all, I was more worried about having Eric get some projects done that needed to be finished before he left. The babies will be mobile by the time he returns so getting some of the baby proofing started was pretty important.

As for the deployment I would be lying if I said I was not heartbroken because I am, we have wanted a family for so long so that we would be able to share the excitement of watching them grow and now Eric is going to miss all their first holidays and a lot of their first milestones. I know we have many more holidays to celebrate, but that does not make it any easier. I spent my first night of deployment with some macaroni and cheese, ice cream and a glass of wine, I went for broke with the comfort items thats for sure. I am so thankful that Eric is a technology nerd and will make sure to do whatever he can to be able to see us as much as possible through FaceTime, messaging and talking on the phone. He is such a wonderful hands on dad and I am really going to miss his help over the next months and miss him of course. He is truly my best friend.

I wish we had more time to do things for the boys so that they can see their daddy all the time, but for now they have pictures and Eric also recorded them a story book that I play for them at bed time (who am I kidding I like listening to this as well!…insert ugly sob here). I know we will get through all of this and at the end we will enjoy a nice family vacation together. I am thankful the boys are young and don’t really understand what is going on because seeing the older children was truly heartbreaking. The boys and I are looking forward to staying really busy and hanging out with friends and family over the next months and counting down the days until we get our very best friend back in our life!

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Mason’s new trick

Mason was playing on the floor yesterday and before I knew it he was on his belly and then within seconds he was on his back again! He has been so close to rolling and he has finally figured it out and I am one proud mama. He can’t stop rolling now that he has figured it out, but the only problem we are having is that he sometimes get stuck on his belly and this makes him pretty frustrated. We are hoping he figures this out soon so he can be a much happier baby 🙂 Mason’s doctor is also having us try him on some reflux medicine and it has done wonders for him. He has been on it for a week now and he is so much happier, he would cry quite a bit before and we couldn’t figure out what the problem was and after some trial and error and I think this is what works for now. He is just smiling all the time now and this was not happening before, I hope that the medicine continues to help him in the future.

The scary sight Mason gives his mom with his new trick

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4 months old!

Our boys are now 4 months old! We can’t believe how fast the time has flown and my babies are now 1/3 of the way to a year old…sound the violins :(.

They had they 4 month appointment today and they both are doing so awesome. I can’t say enough about their awesome pediatrician, maybe it is because we have twins but the nurses and doctor remember us every time we walk into the door and this was very important to Eric and I. We switched the boys off the traditional military health insurance to what they call the “standard” version, this allowed us to pick their doctor. We have to now pay deductibles and co-pays but really I can’t put a price on my child’s health so I can’t complain about this one bit. Now onto the stats:

Parker is 12 lbs 5 ounces and he is 25 inches long

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Mason is 13 lbs 15 ounces and he is 26 inches long

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They are both super long now and they fall into the 50th (Parker) percentile and 85th (Mason) percentile, this is impressive because this is on the 4 month scale and they are actually 3 months adjusted.

Parker is in the 2nd percentile for weight and Mason is in the 16th percentile so they are long and lean, but have big noggins with both of them in the 60th percentile.

Even though they were born 4 weeks early they still put them on the charts as if they were full term babies so I am happy with their progress. They handled their vaccines like little champs and mommy only cried a little bit, I swear it takes me longer to get over them. I need my baby boys to slow down a little bit!

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That dreaded question!

The one question that seems to bring a lot of debate to the world of parenting is do you breast or formula feed? I know I had touched on this before and the struggle I had with the boys and nursing. I still get asked often if they are formula fed or breastfed and quite honestly the only person that I feel has a need to ask this question is their pediatrician. I think sometimes (and this does not apply to everyone) for people who were able to successfully breastfed without any issues don’t understand why others were not able to and people who formula feed feel that they need to defend their choices.

I wanted to be able to nurse and honestly never thought that I would have issues both emotionally and with supply and have to switch to formula, but we did and I am okay with this choice. I don’t regret this choice, but I do still feel a little sad when I see someone nursing their baby because it was something I wanted. I then remind myself that my boys are healthy and thriving. Someone who wanted to nurse but couldn’t does not make the decision to change their baby to formula lightly, I had plenty of tearful conversations with my husband about this decision. One thing I learned from other moms who had to pump for their babies was never to quit on a bad day so I stuck it out until I was able to peacefully accept my decision to formula feed. 

I just think moms need to support each other more instead of tearing each other down. My babies do not love me any less because I was not able to nurse them and I don’t feel like we have a broken bond because we use a bottle. Babies need to be loved and nurtured and how we feed them is no indication of the adult they will become, but a child who is raised in a loving and caring home can help shape the adult they will become. I was formula fed and I was very attached to my mother as a child and to this day she is still one of my best friends and this was because of the love she showed me and not the food she put in my mouth. So to all my mommy friends out there keep doing what you are doing and love your babies and feed them whatever way works best for your family 🙂 

I will climb off my soapbox now haha and share some pictures of my beautiful little boys! 

 

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Truly amazed

During my pregnancy I joined the The Bump and while this forum had a lot of great information, it was just not for me even though I really liked some of the ladies who posted. These ladies decided to create a Facebook group and asked if anyone wanted to join and I thought hey “why not?” if I don’t like I can just leave. Well these ladies ended up being a lifeline for me during my pregnancy! As a group we have been through so much over the past ten months from premature births to frightening heart surgeries. Some of us struggled to get pregnant while others had a surprise blessing, but what connects us all is our love for our babies. After my immediate family being notified that my water had broken these ladies were the ones who knew next! I can honestly say I have laughed with these ladies and I have cried with these ladies. I am amazed by the bond that can be formed between a group of women who mostly have not met one another, but it is there!

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This past week these women have truly amazed me with their acts of kindness. One of our mommy friends was going though a hard time and instead of just saying “oh I’m sorry” or “thats too bad”, a few of these ladies said hey she is one of us and we need to put a smile back on her face. The group got together very secretively 🙂 and planned a lot of nice surprises for this mama, everyone pitched in and the turnout was phenomenal! I could not believe the outpouring of love from these mamas and I am so proud honored to call them my friends! I can’t wait to hopefully meet some of these amazing ladies and their babies next year. 

 

It’s nice to be reminded that a little kindness can go a long way, so the next time you are given the chance to show some kindness…do it you won’t regret it! 

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The first love of my life

A little back story on the first love of my life…no not Keagan, haha even though I love him too! 

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Today is our 4 year wedding anniversary and its hard for me to believe how fast the time has gone by! Eric and I didn’t date for very long before getting engaged, but I just knew that he was the “one”. We did not have a traditional wedding, we did the pretty typical military wedding aka the courthouse. Eric was leaving for a year long school and because he is in the Army they don’t recognize a fiancé for moving purposes so it was much easier for us to have a small little quick wedding. We didn’t want to have a large wedding anyway, which was weird for me because when I was little I dreamed of this big wedding but when it came down to it the thought of spending such a large amount of money on a day it really changed my mind. I love having family gatherings but for us saving this money has allowed us to buy a home, put down payments on cars, and just not worry about finances as much. 

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One of our first photos together

 

In the almost five years since I have known this wonderful man we have lived in 3 states and 4 different homes, oh and had two amazing little babies! I can’t wait to see where we end up in the future and I look forward to many more years with the love of my life. We have so many adventures planned with our little family and I can’t wait to experience them with all 3 of my boys! Happy Anniversary my love! 

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The waiting game…

So I debated writing about this topic because it is such a personal one, but I have decided that people need to be more aware of this. As I mentioned in my first blog we waited a long time to have our baby boys and this was not a choice of our own. We were not one of the lucky couples that decided to have a baby and then bam it happens, we tried for quite some time to get pregnant. Month after month we started the cycle all over again until I finally felt like something just was not right. I went and saw my doctor and was informed that I had Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), the thing with PCOS is that there is no test to diagnosis this exactly they look at different symptoms that you are having and then say yay or nay to it. 

When we arrived to North Carolina we sought the help of a fertility specialist and because we are stationed in NC we were so very lucky to be at one of the Army bases that actually has a fertility specialist (I believe only 5-6 bases have them). This meant for us that we were able to get very low cost fertility help because the doctor was there to train other doctors and medical students in his specialty. PCOS can interfere with your ability to ovulate on your own so this was one of our big issues with trying to have a family of our own and soon after arriving in NC the doctor discovered that I would need surgery to remove a polyp in order to move on in our journey. We waited almost 9 months for a surgery date (downfall of a low cost military clinic, long waits). My surgery happened in April of 2013 and we jumped back into our treatment plan which resulted in our beautiful baby boys being conceived in September 2013. This is the cliffnotes version of our journey because I think our entire journey would require quite a few posts. 

We knew we would have a risk of twins because most fertility treatments increase your chances of conceiving more than one and we were okay with this :). We often get asked if twins run in our family and we just go with the answer of yes, it works out great that my grandmother had two sets of twins including my dad being one of them. I don’t normally discuss how the boys came to be with strangers because it is not something most people understand to be honest. I was lucky enough to have a great support group here of women all going through the same experiences that we were and I am happy to say that we all have wonderful, amazing, loved little babies now! Some of these babies are even getting siblings here soon! We spent months chatting with each other sharing our heartaches and happiness and just being there for each other. Struggling with infertility is a painful and full of sorrow, but when they hand you that baby all that pain and sorrow just melts away. I can’t imagine my life any different and I also can’t imagine not having twins. Mason and Parker will have a bond that no one else will understand and they will hopefully have a best friend for life. We hope to maybe (not decided yet) give them a sibling one day but we would only consider this if it happened naturally, if not our hearts are so very full with the two boys we have. 

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